By: Natasha Cooke, Practicum Student Supervised by Melissa Barton, LPC-S

Do you struggle with confrontation?

 Many of us do. Many of us even fear confrontation. We dread conversations that make us feel uneasy. We avoid conflict at all costs. Sometimes, we even go out of our way to confront the people we need to confront. Confronting someone you care about can be especially difficult. You may be afraid that you come off as “needy” or “demanding.” You may not know how to approach the conversation. Many of us wonder if confrontation is worth it or if we would rather “keep the peace.”

What is It?

Often, people believe that confrontation is something negative. Even Webster’s dictionary describes confrontation as a bad thing. In truth, confrontation can bring people closer together, strengthens relationship, and helps set healthy boundaries. In mental health, confrontation is defined as describing another person’s behavior so that that person can understand the consequences of their actions. The goal of confrontation is for the person being confronted to change their behavior.

Dangers of Avoiding Confrontation:

 It is normal to be afraid of having a difficult conversation with someone. For example, it may seem complicated to confront your coworkers and ask them not to call you that hurtful nickname anymore. You may feel like they may want to stop being your friend or think less of you. So, what is the harm in avoiding that conversation? You may think that not speaking up is the best thing to do. But, in truth, you are letting others cross boundaries that hurt you. Avoiding confrontation can also lead to lower self-esteem. When we keep ignoring others’ harmful behavior, we are telling ourselves that we are not worth being treated fairly. For example, let’s say you have a friend who keeps canceling on you last minute or often forgets to meet you for a hangout. This likely hurts your feelings. You want to confront them, but it seems too hard. Letting them continue this behavior means that your time is not worth as much as theirs. This can lead you to believe you are less important than others, a sign of low self-esteem. Other dangers of avoiding confrontation include broken relationships, low confidence, feelings of uneasiness, unhappiness, fear in relationships, social anxiety, and stressful environments, among many more. In sum, it’s best to learn how to overcome your fear of confrontation and become more assertive in your everyday life.

How to Overcome Avoiding Confrontation:

There are many ways counselors can help people who fear confrontation. Cognitive-behavior therapy, talk therapy, communication skills, role-playing, assertiveness training, and confidence building are just a few ways counselors help people become more comfortable with confrontation.

Begin Therapy To Learn Confrontation Skills in Katy, TX!

If you are ready to learn confrontation skills, one of the therapists at The Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide mental health counseling, as well as other mental health services. To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:

• Contact our office to set up an appointment or to learn more about emotionally focused therapy
• Meet with one of our compassionate therapists
• Find ways to thrive in your relationship!

Other Therapy Services We Offer: 

Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch, we offer counseling services for people of all ages in areas including counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, couples counseling, eating disorder treatment, men's issues, women's issues, anxiety treatment, depression therapy, trauma counseling, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to post blogs regularly. We provide helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!