By: Carey Robey, MS, LPC, NCC

Internal Versus External Coping Skills

Hopefully, we have all heard of coping skills. For those of you that haven’t- coping skills are the tools we use to deal with times of distress. We all have difficult things that come up every now and then that we must face, but facing those things can be challenging when not having the proper skills. Coping skills come in many forms, but today I want to remind you about internal versus external coping skills.

What’s the Difference?

Internal coping skills are those which require nothing but ourselves. External coping skills are those which utilize things outside of ourselves. Some examples of internal coping skills are thought challenging, deep breathing, positive visualization, meditation, and positive self-talk. Examples of external coping skills are drawing, watching television, playing games, talking to others, working out, and reading, and writing. The reason why it is important to recognize the difference and have skills in both areas is that you cannot rely on one kind all the time.

When to use Internal versus External?

We need to have the ability to utilize both internal and external coping skills for different reasons. For example, if I remember something distressing at work, I cannot simply pull out my coloring book and start coloring in front of co-workers. I need to be able to quickly engage in self-talk and bring myself back to being attentive to the task at hand. In certain settings, it is not feasible or appropriate to distract me using external means. I need to be able to rely on myself. At other times, we might be so distressed we simply need a distraction. Sometimes it can be helpful to utilize external resources to help us through our times of distress. I often find it helpful to confide in a friend or distract myself with my favorite show; sometimes, it’s nice to be able to engage in an activity to take my mind off things. It is important that we know what is helpful for us so that in times of need, we are quickly able to seek that thing out.

In Conclusion

I encourage my clients to practice using coping skills even when the need to alleviate stress isn’t there because it is a crucial part to being able to constructively utilize them when the need is there. Think of this as self-care; we can do these things to add to our lives when things are going well. Thinking positively, working on challenging negative thinking habits, taking walks or talking with friends, baking or reading- all these things only add value to our lives, so it shouldn’t be a chore to practice them regularly. Then when the time comes, you know what works for you, and you are prepared, whether it be a time when you need to use your internal coping skills or external coping skills. For more help in understanding how to grow these skills, or if you want to increase your overall wellness and self-care, come see me for therapy!

Begin Therapy in Katy, TX!

If you are ready to work on internal and external coping skills, one of the therapists at The Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide mental health counseling, as well as other mental health services. To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:

• Contact our office to set up an appointment or to learn more information
• Meet with one of our compassionate therapists
• Find ways to thrive using coping skills today!

Other Therapy Services We Offer: 

Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch, we offer counseling services for people of all ages in areas including counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, couples counseling, eating disorder treatment, men's issues, women's issues, anxiety treatment, depression therapy, trauma counseling, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to post blogs regularly. We provide helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!