Why do Kids Bully?
Posted: November 26, 2024
By: Simrah Wasim, MS, LPC Associate
Supervised Melissa Barton, MA, LPC-S
Why do Kids Bully?
As we’re always told, bullying is never the answer. While this is true, understanding why a bully behaves the way they do will help handle the situation correctly and effectively. Moreover, this will not only help the people being bullied but also help the bullies themselves. After all, many bullies are unaware of why they act the way they do.What makes a bully?
Children tend to behave inappropriately or aggressively due to many factors. Their stressors and problems start to begin at a young age. When children are overwhelmed, lack attention, are neglected, go through trauma, or are under the influence of substances, this creates bullying. There are other situations where bullying can begin to play a role. For example, if a sibling or parent/guardian shows signs of bullying themselves or has aggressive characteristics, it can be influential. Often, a parent may not handle their anger or conflicts well. Children follow what they see, and this is now a norm that has detrimental effects. Typically, children begin to bully due to these learned behaviors. Children at school can begin bullying to be liked by others because they have low self-esteem, are being ignored, are jealous because they are bullied at home, or want to avoid being bullied themselves. They think if they have the upper hand, then no one can bully them first. Many times, kids bully others to “protect themselves.” Even though bullying is used as a defense mechanism, it is not appropriate. Bullies usually use mean words and actions. Many bullies may engage in these behaviors to feel stronger, have more power, or feel smarter. They essentially bully to protect themselves from any type of harm. Nonetheless, inappropriate behaviors can be unlearned and replaced with positive behaviors.How do we address a bully?
Although a bully may go through many struggles on their own, it is never alright to project and be mean to others. Having positive behaviors, gentle words, and respectful conflict resolution at home and school can help model appropriate behaviors. Learning how to stand up for oneself respectfully and safely is a crucial tool to have. It is also important to know what safe spaces are and who to turn to if needed. If there is a bully and the problem cannot be solved amongst each other, reach out for help. If you are a parent/guardian and your child is being bullied, offer them the right information. Tell them it is alright to speak to a trusted adult (parent, teacher, coach, counselor, etc.). This will help them find the right resources and tools to address the matter.Begin Therapy in Katy, TX!
If need help dealing with bullies, one of the therapists at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide mental health counseling, as well as other mental health services. To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:- Contact our office to set up an appointment or to learn more information
- Meet with one of our knowledgeable therapists
- Find ways to thrive through therapy today!