Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch
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By: Margie Frisco, Practicum Student, UHV Do you need help on how to handle stress? Many times in life we get caught up in the hustle and grind of everyday life. This can be due to having children to take care of, coordinating their schedules, or cleaning the house. For others this can be due […]
Recognize What Causes You Stress
Self-CareIf you are ready to learn how to make yourself a priority and manage your stress, the therapists at The Center at Cinco Ranch can help! To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services for people of all ages including: women’s issues, couples counseling, treatment for anxiety, trauma counseling, counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, men’s therapy , eating disorder treatment, depression treatment, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Quique Autrey, MS, LPC Associate For the last 5 years, I’ve worked with teenagers and young adults diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). ASD is a developmental disorder that affects a person’s communication and social behavior. ASD is a spectrum diagnosis which means there are different levels of severity. Some people diagnosed with ASD […]
For the last 5 years, I’ve worked with teenagers and young adults diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). ASD is a developmental disorder that affects a person’s communication and social behavior. ASD is a spectrum diagnosis which means there are different levels of severity. Some people diagnosed with ASD have severe deficits in communication and social functioning and require substantial support all their life. Others experience social challenges, but can hope to live a life of relative independence with some professional support.
There are different kinds of therapy available for individuals diagnosed with ASD. Applied Behavioral Analysis (ABA) is considered the gold-standard treatment for younger children with ASD. ABA is a type of therapy that can improve social, communication, and learning skills through positive reinforcement. Most of my ASD clients are older and relatively high-functioning and thus benefit from talk therapy. What is talk therapy and why is it beneficial for someone diagnosed with ASD?
Sigmund Freud, one of the founders of modern therapy, referred to his work as the “talking cure.” At its most basic level, talk therapy is an arrangement between a therapist and a client where a client works to transform his/her emotional state by talking and learning coping skills. While talk therapy cannot remove a person’s Autism, it can help them accept and better manage it.
As I am presenting it, talk therapy is not social skills or group therapy. Traditional talk therapy is two individuals facing each other in a room and talking about the emotional and social concerns of the client.
The Benefits of Talk Therapy Every teen and young adult on the spectrum I’ve ever worked with has struggled with low self-esteem. Why is this? The number one reason is that all of them have experienced bullying and have felt like social outcasts. Persons on the spectrum usually have a hard time reading social cues. They also struggle to regulate negative emotions. As a result, ASD individuals stick out in social situations and have a hard time fitting into the typical norms of the group.
Talk therapy encourages teens and young adults with ASD to translate their raw emotions and pain into words and language that helps them make better sense of their experience. Furthermore, not only does it encourage people to translate their suffering into speech, it provides an environment of love, acceptance, and non-judgement. The positive relationship that’s established between the therapist and the client is an important part of the client’s growth in self-esteem.
Many teens diagnosed with ASD struggle with being labeled. They fear that having this diagnosis makes them “weird” and “different” in a negative way. Part of the process of talk therapy is helping the client to accept their diagnosis. The therapist and client can discuss what the diagnosis means. Moreover, they can explore some of the challenges of being on the spectrum. Talk therapy also helps the client understand some of the strengths of the diagnosis. Many people on the spectrum have gifts and abilities that enable them to make a wonderful contribution to society.
ASD is a life-long disorder. While it may not be possible to outgrow Autism, it is possible to manage it and develop as a person. The management skills someone can learn in talk therapy include life, social and emotional coping skills.
In talk therapy, the client and therapist may discuss situations that arise at school or work. More importantly, they can explore what did not go so well. After understanding what went wrong, the therapist and client can role play a similar scenario and practice healthier ways to respond and relate to others. Talk therapy should provide depth and practicality. The therapist and client can talk about everything from the meaning of life to the importance of taking care of one’s personal hygiene.
What To Look For In A Therapist For Talk TherapyFirstly, not all therapists are equal. If your child has been diagnosed with ASD, it’s important to find a therapist who has experience working with ASD. ASD is a unique disorder that cannot be treated in the same way as anxiety, depression or other common diagnoses.
Secondly, it is also very important that your son or daughter connect with their therapist. Therapy will not be effective if the client does not bond with the therapist. Since many individuals with ASD already have a difficult time connecting with others, the formation of a therapeutic relationship will be essential to effective treatment.
Finally, seek out a therapist who is open to communicating and including the parents and siblings in therapy. ASD is a difficult diagnosis that impacts the whole family. It can have a negative impact on a marriage and the emotional well being of siblings. Steer clear of therapists who just want to focus on the ASD client and keep the family at a distance. Talk therapy is a useful tool that can incorporate the entire family.
If you are ready to begin therapy, one of the therapists at The Center at Cinco Ranch can help! To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services for people of all ages including: women’s issues, couples counseling, treatment for anxiety, trauma counseling, counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, men’s therapy , eating disorder treatment, depression treatment, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Carey Robey, MS, LPC Healthy boundaries are an essential part of keeping good mental health. So how do we ensure we are establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries? Well, setting boundaries is not just about setting limits with those in our lives, but also prioritizing your relationship with yourself. We have to remember our worth […]
Healthy boundaries are an essential part of keeping good mental health. So how do we ensure we are establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries? Well, setting boundaries is not just about setting limits with those in our lives, but also prioritizing your relationship with yourself. We have to remember our worth and our values.
Now more than ever, lines are blurred when it comes to work/life balance and relationships. It is important that we remember to build our personal and emotional space in a way that is healthy for us. Being aware and setting boundaries provides clarity around what is good for us, what feels comfortable, and what is healthy for our life. It can help us regain some sense of control- something that right now many feel they have lost.
There are many things we can do to reevaluate our boundaries right now! Notice the people, places, and things that tend to drain you. Is there any room or way for change in these areas? Inspect different parts of your life and self, such as physical, mental, and emotional health, work, social, and home life, and self-care. Check for any holes that may leave room for improvement. Make it a habit to notice your personal limits; when we overdo it, we risk burnout and resentment.
It is okay to say “no” and communicating with clarity and assertiveness are skills that can be learned in therapy. Setting boundaries can sometimes be hard and even uncomfortable, but allow yourself the opportunity so that you are not denying yourself happiness and self-growth. Remember to seek support if you feel overwhelmed through talking to someone like a therapist or friend and utilize coping skills and relaxation techniques.
Maybe you’re the kind of person that puts others before yourself- while that is a caring and worthy trait, it can mean you struggle to know your own worth and may have difficulty setting boundaries. Take some time to consider what is important to you. Evaluate what your values are and how you can implement them into your life. Remember that boundaries are not set in stone; they are flexible and can change when you need them to as life evolves. Check in with yourself frequently and remember sometimes it’s okay to put yourself first.
If you are ready to find out how to establish healthy boundaries, the therapists at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide therapy to people of all ages. To begin counseling in Katy, TX, follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services in other areas including trauma counseling, counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, couples counseling, eating disorder treatment, depression treatment, anxiety treatment, men’s issues, women’s issues, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Quique Autrey, MS, LPC Associate Guys, it’s time to step out of the box! Which box, you ask? The box that society has placed us in for decades. Man box culture. A box that defines what it means to be a real man. We’re told to think outside the box in our early education, […]
Guys, it’s time to step out of the box! Which box, you ask? The box that society has placed us in for decades. Man box culture. A box that defines what it means to be a real man. We’re told to think outside the box in our early education, all the while expected to remain in this restrictive man box for the rest of our lives. Enough is enough! Man box culture is not good for us.
Studies show that trying to live inside the man box results in more violence, greater risk of suicide, increased drinking and poor mental health. The problem is not masculinity. The issue is not being a man. The real villain is man box culture. Man box culture presents a rigid formula for what it means to be a man and expects all men to conform. We need to stop blaming men for being men. Instead, we need to support the men in our lives by helping them to step out of the man box culture and step in to a healthy version of masculinity.
Sexuality is not rigid or easily defined. According to the spectrum model of sexuality, a man’s sexual identity exists along a spectrum of possibilities rather than an either/or binary. Man box culture sees sexuality as a hierarchy with being straight at the top.
Identifying as gay is seen as inferior. Countless teenage boys use the phrase, “you’re gay” as a way to communicate that a person is stupid or unpopular. This is not acceptable. A healthy masculinity has room for many expressions of sexuality, each valuable in their own right.
Assertive, not Aggressive. Man box culture reinforces the stereotype that to be a real man is to be a strong, angry and forceful person. Real men are not weak and vulnerable. True men don’t give in to fear and they get what they want! This logic sadly results in countless men expressing their anger in violent and disruptive ways.
Instead of encouraging aggression, healthy masculinity promotes assertiveness. Assertiveness is the ability to express what you really want or need while still respecting the other person. An aggressive man gets his needs met by using his strength to overpower another person. An assertive man negotiates what he needs using reason and cooperation.
One of the most popular stereotypes of man box culture is that real men do not show emotions. Boys don’t cry, we’re told from a young age. I can’t tell you how many times I was told as a young boy, “Suck it up kid. Don’t be a girl. Pick yourself up and get on with it!”
According to Mark Green, senior editor for the GoodMen Project, boys three to four years old are taught to push down naturally occurring emotions. The result? Boys lose connection with themselves and others. By not allowing ourselves to feel the full spectrum of human emotions, we set ourselves up for social isolation and a lack of empathy.
Healthy masculinity encourages men to feel all the emotions that make us human, including fear, sadness and jealousy. By making emotions ok, men have a greater chance of connecting with themselves and those around them.
Man box culture hurts women as well as men. According to the rules of the man box, women are inferior sex objects that can be used and manipulated. Everything from Netflix to pornography has trained men in the man box to reduce women to their bodies and to not see them as intelligent equals. With this mentality, sexual exploitation and horrendous violence become live options for countless men.
Healthy masculinity reminds men that women are their equals, not their sexual exploits. Connecting with women at a sexual, intellectual and even spiritual level can be much more rewarding than the power games encouraged by the man box culture.
A lot of men today feel attacked for being a man. The problem is not masculinity per say. The problem is the unhealthy masculinity reinforced and promoted by man box culture. Are you tired of being isolated in the man box? Are you ready to work on some of the issues highlighted above? Unfortunately, there are very few spaces in our society to talk honestly about the dangers of man box culture.
One of the only places men can freely work on these realities is in therapy. Men’s therapy offers men an opportunity to work on their struggles with sexuality, aggression, repressed emotions and relationships with women in a nonjudgmental setting. A therapist is a trained professional who can help you navigate the unhealthy extremes of man box culture and help you develop the tools to flourish as a healthy man. The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch currently has a Men’s Therapy Group. Reach out for more information.
If you are ready to grow into a healthy man, one of the therapists at The Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide men’s counseling as well as other services to people of all ages. To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services for people of all ages including: women’s issues, couples counseling, treatment for anxiety, trauma counseling, counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, eating disorder treatment, depression treatment, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Jessica Johns-Green, LPC Diets force change by setting strict rules but mostly create only temporary change. The underlying issues – emotionally and mentally – stay the same. Or even get worse. Cutting calories makes us focus on food more. And failure? That’s just the weight loss industry’s way of making sure you are […]
Diets force change by setting strict rules but mostly create only temporary change. The underlying issues – emotionally and mentally – stay the same. Or even get worse. Cutting calories makes us focus on food more. And failure? That’s just the weight loss industry’s way of making sure you are a customer for life. The toughest first step is not to let shame and guilt force you to look away and hide. Also not to see genetics or physical health issues as insurmountable barriers. But instead to decide that you can do something about this. A change in attitude and taking care of your mental wellbeing is a route to healthy bodyweight – for good!
Plan for success, and for failure – Planning skills are far more important than a ‘meal plan’. The ability to look at what’s ahead in your day/week, to see what your body needs and make plans to provide it will get you much further than any diet ever could. Recognizing that you need – and deserve – healthy food to fuel your day. And that getting it won’t happen by accident. When we’re hungry and rushed, drive thru’s will win every time. Planning ahead doesn’t have to mean making food ahead of time, but it does mean approaching your day with an idea about how you will meet your needs. A key here is also plan for failure. What will you do when it goes wrong? Deciding ahead of time to learn from failures (what could I do differently next time?) and face your actions with compassion is a skill of people who lose weight and keep it off for good.If you are ready to find help with your emotional eating, binge eating, eating disorder or body image the therapists at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide therapy to people of all ages and now offer a Healthy Body Therapy Group, every other Friday at 12 noon. To begin counseling in Katy, TX, follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services in areas including counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, couples counseling, eating disorder treatment, men’s issues, women’s issues, anxiety treatment, depression therapy, trauma counseling, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Quique Autrey, MS, LPC Associate Teenage boys are wild, quirky and full of life. Many of them are running at full speed. They may be smart and passionate, but many struggle to make the best decisions in life. They seem to be more driven by their appetite and hormones than reason and common sense. […]
Teenage boys are wild, quirky and full of life. Many of them are running at full speed. They may be smart and passionate, but many struggle to make the best decisions in life. They seem to be more driven by their appetite and hormones than reason and common sense. Then there’s the fact that we rarely pay attention to our teen’s mental health. Focusing on our boy’s mental health is as important as caring about their physical health and academic performance. In fact, the more we help our teens improve their mental health, the greater chance they have of succeeding in all the areas of their life. Teen boys need access to a mental health toolkit that can help them feel good about themselves and to relate more positively to others.
Teenage boys need strong friendships. Positive friendships provide shared experiences that help improve a guy’s self esteem. Making friends is not always easy at their age. Young boys have a much easier time making friends at school or in the neighborhood. Teens have to worry about status, expectations and all the other stressors that make cultivating a friendship a real challenge. Don’t completely write off online friendships.
Online friendships can have an important place in a teen’s life. In our current day, it is not always possible to hang out with friends face to face. Teenage boys have developed creative ways to connect with their peers on social media, video games and other digital platforms. Parents should be careful not to take away social connections when giving a consequence. There are other ways to discipline a teen than taking away their access to friends.
We all benefit from having interests outside of work and school. A hobby is anything creative or active a teen can engage in that will help them take a break from their daily stressors and routine. During the last year many teens have been forced to stay home in front of a screen.
Encouraging a hobby that requires physical exercise and time outside could be a real plus. Many teens benefit from martial arts or rock climbing. For the more creative types, learning to play the guitar or work on a car can be a good idea.
A hobby does not have to cost an arm and a leg! There are plenty of options out there that are affordable. The important thing to remember is that your teen needs active and creative time away from their normal schedule.
Teen boys do not always want to talk to their parents about what’s going on. That’s not always a bad thing. Since there are some things teens feel embarrassed to talk to their parents about (SEX!), it’s important that we help our teens connect with other mature adults.
If your son plays sports, getting to know the coach is a good idea. Coaches can help teens practice self-discipline and teamwork. If your family attends church, encouraging a relationship with the youth worker can be a huge positive. Your son can learn important lessons about compassion, service and making wise decisions. A therapist can also be a great adult relationship for your son. In therapy, your son can learn the value of talking about feelings and creating attainable goals.
It is important for teen boys to feel they are in control of some aspects of their life. Teen boys often fall into depression when they feel like nothing they do really matters. What is something you can encourage your son to do that will give him a sense of control and mastery?
One simple thing is asking him to clean his room. Are you serious? Yes! Of course they won’t like this suggestion at first. But think about it. Their room is their little kingdom. If a teen can begin to take responsibility for cleaning and maintaining their room, this can spill over into other aspects of their life. Your teen may start to take greater control over their schedule, their friendships and their emotions. It has to start somewhere.
Exercise could be the most significant tool in your son’s mental health toolkit. It helps relieve stress and release hormones. With Covid-19, many teens have stopped exercising and their mental health has suffered. It’s never too late to start an exercise routine.
There’s no one right approach here. You don’t have to run a marathon every weekend! Some teens prefer to lift weights with their friends. Others enjoy putting on their favorite playlist and jogging around the neighborhood. Playing basketball or soccer are great options too. The key is to be consistent.
Movies and TV shows have given counseling a bad rap. Counseling is not about lying on a couch, staring at the ceiling and relating all of your problems to your mom! Counseling is more about building a genuine relationship with a professional that can help you take positive steps in the direction you want to go.
Teen boys that come to therapy need help creating their mental health tool kit. They benefit from a place where they can talk about their friends, their stressors and goals. A counselor can help them devise a plan to cope with their struggles and accomplish their dreams.
If you are ready to improve your teens life, one of the therapists at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide counseling to both teens and adults for a variety of issues. To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services in areas including counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, couples counseling, eating disorder treatment, men’s issues, women’s issues, anxiety treatment, depression therapy, trauma counseling, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Melissa Barton, MA, LPC-S Being a parent can be one of the most exciting and rewarding jobs out there. Yet, it comes with its challenges. Parenting a teenager may bring even more struggles to the table. I am a mom of two middle school girls, and a therapist to teens and their parents by […]
Being a parent can be one of the most exciting and rewarding jobs out there. Yet, it comes with its challenges. Parenting a teenager may bring even more struggles to the table. I am a mom of two middle school girls, and a therapist to teens and their parents by trade. So, I get it.
As parents, we want to do the best job possible. We want our kids to be kind to others, have high self-esteem, succeed in school, be active, participate in extra-curricular activities, and the list goes on. It’s hard to keep up. So, maybe there are some things we can let go of. Below are my ideas on what those things could be. (I do believe these things are important, just maybe less important than healthy relationships and decreased conflict.)
#1. Choice of clothing or hairstyle. Teenagers are figuring themselves out. They want to be unique and express themselves. Sometimes they do this by choosing a style that is “a little out there,” or a hair color that makes us question their judgment. I say; as long as they are covering the parts that need covering, let them try things on for size. It’s not worth the battle.
#2. Checking Homework and Grades. I will admit to becoming obsessive about logging in and checking my kids’ grades at times. Obsessing, then nagging them is not helpful. I DO think we need to be aware of how our teens are doing in school. I also think we need to be there to help them. But, checking grades every day, and asking the same questions every day leads to conflict. Make a plan to check their grades weekly, or even better, mid-grading period. Then ask if they need help. Teenagers learn best through experience. Let them miss an assignment, and learn how it affects their grade. 
#3. Messy Rooms. OK, I am not saying we need to allow moldy towels to pile up or bugs to be crawling around. But, within reason, let your teenager be messy. Teens have a lot on their minds. Their minds are not fully developed. Being tidy and organized might not be a priority to them at the moment. It doesn’t mean they will grow up to be slobs.
#4. Being Cranky. As we all know, teenagers can be moody. They may give you the silent treatment, or answer you gruffly in the morning. Don’t take it personally. Hormones, social media, school stress, and even a pandemic may be on their minds. Be ready to listen when they are ready to talk, but don’t force it.
***Side Note: If you notice significant changes in mood, signs of depression & anxiety, or evidence of self-harm, please reach out to professionals.
If you are looking for support or help for your teenager, counseling may the answer. Family counseling, group and individual therapy for teens, or parental coaching are great options. Learning to let go of some things can be helpful, but difficult to implement on our own. Also, trained professionals best address mental health issues.
If you are ready to find help with parenting a teen, or find support for your teenager, the therapists at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide therapy to people of all ages. To begin counseling in Katy, TX, follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services in areas including counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, couples counseling, eating disorder treatment, men’s issues, women’s issues, anxiety treatment, depression therapy, trauma counseling, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
Authored by: Jason Drake, a Licensed Clinical Worker-Supervisor (LCSW-S). Group therapy is a powerful counseling approach for both adults and teens. We have found and studies support our findings that group therapy for teens can be more impactful for teens. When teens take part in group therapy, it tends to be fertile ground for growth […]
Group therapy is a powerful counseling approach for both adults and teens. We have found and studies support our findings that group therapy for teens can be more impactful for teens.
When teens take part in group therapy, it tends to be fertile ground for growth and development. A teen therapist who specializes in teen counseling facilitates the group. This teen therapist provides the rules and structure of the group to ensure emotional and physical safety.
Once the structure is understood, the teen therapist who specializes in teen counseling, facilitates conversation and exploration of issue that teens may not have otherwise addressed. Below are three reasons how group therapy for teens can help your teen.
Teen depression has increased 59% since 2007. A survey from the American Psychological Association found that teens today report stress levels as high as those that adults report. When school is in, teens report higher stress levels than adults report.
Group therapy allows teens to meet with other teens who experience similar life situations. Often, teens feel like they are all alone battling their internal struggles. It’s not that others in their lives aren’t trying to help, but they simply may not be able to understand. Unless you yourself have experienced the internal struggles that the teen experiences, it can be hard to relate.
With group therapy, a teen can find such relief talking with other teens who are experiencing the same internal struggles. It can normalize what the teen is struggling with once they know they are not alone.
When teens can see that they are not alone, it seems to lift a weight from their shoulders. It also opens them up to feedback from those teens who are or have experienced what they are going through.
As a parent, you can provide the most significant piece of wisdom to help your teen. If your teen could follow that piece of wisdom it would probably help. But, since it’s coming from their parent, it may not carry the weight needed to get through to the teen.
A teen in group therapy who is or has experienced similar things to your teen can provide the same piece of wisdom. Now this piece of wisdom is accepted as amazing by the teen and they may now internalize the feedback. That is the power of group therapy for teens!
The above hypothetical example is one experience in one moment in time for the teen in group therapy. Now, imagine the power of your teen attending weekly group therapy for teens over the course of weeks or months.
The Hope That Can be Instilled Seeing Other Teens SucceedTeens find relief and hope in talking with other teens who are experiencing the same internal battles. Whether it be teen depression, anxiety, ADHD/ADD, trauma, etc., knowing that they are not alone provides comfort.
In group therapy, teens also get to see other teens who have experienced what they are experiencing. Yet, the other teen has overcome the struggle.
When teens are able to see other teens, who they can relate to succeed and overcome their struggles, the hope and motivation in the teen skyrockets.
Individual teen therapy and family therapy can take on a whole new meaning as they take part in group therapy for teens. When they know that there is a way, a path forward, often they tend to work harder.
Teens know they have the support of their peers in group therapy. They know they also have a specialist to guide them in teen therapy. Oftentimes, they view family therapy in a new light. And it all started with your teen working with other teens in group therapy.
If your teen is struggling with teen depression, anxiety, ADHD/ADD, trauma, PTSD or any other internal battle, start the healing journey today. Group therapy can be that missing link that can help your teen make meaning out of their internal battle. There is hope and a pathway forward. If you are ready to let the healing begin, you can follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services for people of all ages including: eating disorder treatment, depression treatment, women’s issues, treatment for anxiety, counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, family therapy, men’s issues, trauma counseling, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Janelle Schlueter, MS, LPC, NCC, CCTP Happy New Year! It’s that time of year when most people are setting some goals. Are you setting a New Year’s Resolution for yourself? Or are you like many others in that you already set a resolution and failed (fell off the diet wagon on day three). One […]
Happy New Year! It’s that time of year when most people are setting some goals. Are you setting a New Year’s Resolution for yourself? Or are you like many others in that you already set a resolution and failed (fell off the diet wagon on day three). One thing is for sure, the pressure of a New Year’s Resolution is more intense than setting a goal any other time of year. Let’s talk about how to set a healthy New Year’s Resolution that will make it more likely to be successful. Ready? Get Set. Let’s Go!
Reduce the Pressure of Goals with One Word!Change the word from ‘resolution’ to ‘goal’. The word ‘resolution’ implies something absolute, concrete, all or nothing. There is no room for error or acknowledgement that there is work to achieve it. The word ‘goal’ implies that there are things we have to do to make this goal achievable. The goal is not going to achieve itself. New Year’s is just another day, you can set a goal on January 1st just the same as any other day!
Both people who work in business and therapists would agree that using SMART goals results in a higher rate of success. When setting a goal, keep SMART in mind:
Keep in mind the outcome you are looking for and use numbers to keep your goal specific. For instance, your goal may be to decrease the number of panic attacks you experience by 50% in 6 weeks.
Making your goal measurable you will know if you are on track throughout the process. For example, if you average 10 panic attacks per week, at the end of the 6 weeks you should be experiencing around 5 panic attacks or less per week.
Goals need to be achievable and realistic. Make sure you do not set yourself up for failure. Setting a goal of having 0 panic attacks in 2 weeks would be unrealistic and may put too much pressure on you. Therefore, setting you further back in treatment.
Is this goal something you really want to achieve or is it someone else’s goal for you? Do you have the emotional or physical energy to give to this goal and the activities that you will need to do? Is this the best time to work on this goal or should you wait until you are better prepared?
How long are you willing to work on this goal? How often are you willing on doing what needs to be done in order to achieve this goal? When is the due date for this goal?
Once you have made your goal SMART you can see it will be much easier to achieve!
Make Sure Your Goals Are Emotionally HealthyIn order to make sure your goals are emotionally healthy you must take time to ask yourself why you are setting these goals. If the answer is 100% for you and not for anyone else, it is probably healthy. Is setting the goal going to improve your quality of life, it is probably healthy.
If you follow the SMART goal method and are choosing goals that are for you and to benefit your quality of life, your goals are much more likely to be emotionally healthy. If you are unsure on what goals to set, how to set them, or feel that you may need to do to be better prepared emotionally before working on goals….
Counseling can help with many issues that you may find yourself struggling with, such as: anxiety, depression, lack of coping skills, communication issues, relationship struggles, history of trauma, obsessive compulsive disorder, sleep issues, addiction, and so much more. Seeing a counselor can help you identify areas that you would like to work on and set SMART goals with you.
As a counselor who specializes in trauma, I see a lot of clients who try to push away traumatic memories for so many years until they cannot function anymore. Don’t let that be you. If you are struggling emotionally, get help! You have one life, make it one where your mind is a safe place to be.
If you are ready to find help in identifying and working on SMART goals for your mental health, the therapists at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide therapy to people of all ages. To begin counseling in Katy, TX, follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services in areas including counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, couples counseling, eating disorder treatment, men’s issues, women’s issues, anxiety treatment, depression therapy, trauma counseling, family therapy, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!
By: Cheri Locke, MA, LPC, CCTP Sex. We are officially in 2021 and sex can still be a taboo topic. So let’s take a minute and talk about sex baby, let’s talk about…(Salt-N-Pepa anyone?) For many couples sex can be a source of great pleasure or great dissatisfaction. There are many factors that can play […]
Sex. We are officially in 2021 and sex can still be a taboo topic. So let’s take a minute and talk about sex baby, let’s talk about…(Salt-N-Pepa anyone?) For many couples sex can be a source of great pleasure or great dissatisfaction. There are many factors that can play a role for couples that experience displeasure in the “bedroom”. Firstly, if there are issues in your sexual relationship, rule out any medical issues. This article is not intended to help with any medical issues. Seek help from your medical provider if you believe any medical issues are present. This blog is intended to help you find ways to understand yourself a little better and hopefully spark a little fun or pleasure back into your sex life! You’re welcome.
Okay so this does not mean that you need to have sex daily. What is does mean is that you need to have a healthy understanding of what you and your partner’s level of needs are when it comes to sex. Couples that experience a strong sexual connection over a long period of time are friends (more about that later) that are able to make sex a priority in their life.
I often hear from couples in my practice that they are busy with life. They forget to make time for one another, whether it is dating, spending quality time, or having sex. An easy exercise to try is to schedule time for sex. Scheduling time for sex allows partners to take a break from life and remember their relationship. Sound unspontaneous? There are ways to make it more spontaneous. For example, you and your partner can fill a jar with “sex” ideas. On the scheduled day pull from the jar and have some fun. There are also many sex coupon books or cards that you can purchase to add mix things up.
When couples first come to see me I ask two questions, “do you feel emotionally connected” and “do you spend intentional time together.” Some couples may answer they feel emotionally connected, but the majority of couples respond they do not spend intentional time together. So what is being intentional? At the most basic level, it is responding to your partner’s needs while being wholly present.
For instance, many couples spend time watching television together. Are you together? Check. But, are you being intentional? My guess is probably not. So while there is not a one answer fits all, I encourage you and your partner to find time in your day, even if it is for 20 minutes, to be present with one another. Talk, hold hands, laugh, create memories. This will not only help create a stronger emotional connection, it will strengthen the friendship bond. In turn, this helps to create a stronger context in your relationship that promotes a healthy sexual relationship.
Red Light, Green Light, Yes To SexMany women enter into therapy explaining they love and desire their partner’s; however, it all adds up to a big zero when it comes to sex. Does this mean they have changed over time into a nonsexual being? My guess is no. What it does mean is there can be a variety of reasons sex has changed over the years. Firstly, the context of how you feel about the relationship or sex may have changed. Figuring out your emotional state in a relationship is very important to figuring out your sexual relationship.
Secondly, people have red lights and green lights to sex. Red lights are what prohibit a person from fully engaging in a sexual experience which can be an internal or external factor. For example, some women have issues with their body image that may prohibit them from being free during sex. This is considered a red light. A red light for men may be performance anxiety. When we are thinking about our bodies or our performance rather than focused on the pleasure of sex, we miss out and lose that connection. At times, we are not even aware of our red lights. However, when we can be fully present during sex, arousal and desire changes.
Furthermore, green lights are the “go” signal for sex. Many people learn about sex through their culture, experiences, and environment. Sex is a learned behavior and some of our first experiences can shape our entire sex life. Some people may be turned on by their partners putting the children to bed, while others are turned on by gently kisses on their neck. Whatever your “go” button(s) are, you need to understand yourself and direct your partner.
The answer is yes, if both partners are willing to assess the issues and make changes to the context of their relationship that are causing sexual difficulties. Both partners need to understand that rarely is the issue just about sex. There are often other components, either in the relationship or with an individual that is prohibiting a strong sexual connection. And, more often than not, I find that people are just not that aware of their needs, which often leaves their partners clueless as well.
If you are ready to improve your relationship and sex life, the therapists at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch can help! We provide couples counseling as well as counseling services to all ages. To begin counseling in Katy, TX follow these three steps:
Here at The Counseling Center at Cinco Ranch we offer counseling services for people of all ages including: eating disorder treatment, depression treatment, women’s issues, treatment for anxiety, counseling for kids, counseling for young adults, teen counseling, family therapy, men’s issues, trauma counseling, and group counseling. Our therapists strive to regularly post blogs with helpful information on a variety of mental health topics. To learn more about our therapists and our counseling services, please reach out to the Counseling Center today!